It Is What It Is

That has become my mantra. I probably say it a million times a day. I say it to remind myself that there are some things that I can't control, that I can't change. It isn't always easy and sometimes I have to bitch. Good thing I have a blog where I can do that.

I have a friend that had an interesting post the other day. It was about how people assume things just by the way we look. She gets asked all sorts of questions because she looks Asian. She was, however, adopted and knows nothing about her biological parents. People ask her really stupid questions, but they aren't trying to be rude. They have made an observation based on her appearance. I get that. I mean that literally and figuratively. I understand that that can be a conversation that she is tired of having with complete strangers. But I also get that same type of questioning. Because I have dark eyes, hair, and skin, people assume that I am hispanic. I'm not. I've had people tell me that I don't appreciate my heritage. Now, that one pisses me off. If I was hispanic, I would be proud of it. I'm not, though. People walk up to me speaking Spanish. I understand more than I speak so my response is no habla. The kicker here is that it is what it is. People are going to assume. They are going to make asses of themselves. I am going to make an ass of myself. But we can accept it's going to happen and get over it or we can wear a big sign that says, "I'm not what you think I am". Can you imagine the questions that would cause?

There is a girl in the big girl's dance class whose mom is crazy. Every time it comes up that we home school, she actually turns her nose up. She has nothing good to say about it or me. But, you know what? It is what it is. She has her opinion. I just try to represnt this family and our home school community with dignity. I could bitch slap her (so tempting sometimes) or I can just let her make a fool of herself. The fact that her husband was on the local school board at one time should make her realize what a great option to public school home schooling is. Instead, she gets that tone in her voice. Instead of focusing on the negative things she has to say, I only talk about the positive. Don't think I am freaking PollyAnna, though. I'm just saying that she and I in a dark alley is not a good combo.

We have some things working that I can't discuss yet. That part is killing me. When we have confirmation, I will. But the waiting is killing me. I just want people to realize that lives are waiting for the yes or the no. Not their lives, but still. I have to sit still and tell myself it is what it is. Worrying, waiting on pins and needles isn't going to make the decisions happen quicker. It isn't going to take away the stress. It's going to eat me alive if I let it. Sometimes I like to wallow around in it and be miserable for a little while. Then I'm done.

Overtime this summer has been almost non existent. We had made great strides bill wise last summer, but there we go digging the hole again. We live on overtime. Without it, the bills don't get paid. We end up relying more on credit cards to get us through. Then we're back in the same hole when it's all over. Hubby and I have taken a couple of steps to try to change that including some serious budgeting that works most of the time, but not always. It is what it is. We do what we have to do to feed our kids, keep a roof over our head, whatever. Worrying about it at this time isn't going to help. Doing what we can, what is best for our family will. And prayer is a phenomenal thing.

So that's my list for what it's worth. Even that is what it is. Just keep repeating it over and over. It is what it is. It is what it is. It is what it is.