Summer of Suck Ass

I seriously dislike this computer. As soon as we can afford a new one it is on. I should warn you that since I haven't had a real computer and therefore haven't had the ability to blog, I have a lot of angst built up. It's all gonna come spewing out here.My summer sucked as for the majority of it. I'm trying to make up for it and finish strong, but we'll see. Here's my rundown.

• My mom died. What the hell? I despise doctors that say "I can cure that" or "I can fix that" and then they don't listen because they've been doing this for a long time. Guess what, you're still getting it wrong, dumb ass. She's dead and you're an idiot. This disease should not have killed my mother. Chemo shouldn't have killed her. Radiation shouldn't have affected her. Her doctor should know that sugar is cancer's best friend but not the best friend of the patient. They shouldn't serve yogurt, sodas, and preservative-laden frozen meals as "snacks" at the cancer center for chemo patients. They do that to guarantee repeat business. Kinda hard to have repeat business if you're killing your patients. Yeah, I know, I should tell you how I really feel. My feelings are still all over the place. On one hand I handle all this with grace and wisdom given to me by God. Some days I do not handle this well at all and just want to spend all day in bed sobbing my eyes out and missing my mommy. Today is a pull the covers over my head day. 
• When my feelings are all wonky, I tend to cuss in front of my kids. ALOT. The big girl asked me if she could start saying "crap". At least that's all she's wanting to say. I imagine the boy cusses like a sailor when he's with his friends. He is his mother's child. I'm hoping the cathartic release of anxiety and ick through blogging will help with that. And just stepping up and cleaning up my fucking language. Good luck with that shit. 
• Summer camp was a bust for my kids. We had to pull them out Thursday morning to go to Texas. It was the boy's first year. When we picked them up, the boy had a huge bruise on his forehead. He had a head on collision with another boy. The nurse had drawn on his head with a marker to outline the initial swelling and did neuro checks all night to make sure he and the other boy were alright. The boy said the night before he looked like a unicorn. As his bruise changed colors, we teased him about being a rainbow unicorn. He actually didn't mind that. The big girl was very stand-offish when we got there. She knew why we there to pick them up. She wouldn't let me touch her until we left the office. They had a great time while they were there, and I sure hated to interrupt that. I didn't really have a choice.
• Summer reading didn't happen. I mean, we've read. We just haven't read like we normally do and the prizes did not roll in this summer. I did manage to read all of the 50 Shades of Grey books. Look for that blog. I'm calling it 50 Shades of Bullshit. Good books, don't get me wrong. Sooo not what everyone is making them out to be. There was no writing workshop for the big girl (which she really wanted to do), limited Pokemon Club for the boy and I haven't taken the time to work with the baby on her r/l combinations. We did get registered for one of the reading programs, but then I had to fight with the teenage volunteer who didn't give me all the info I needed when we got started. At one point I pulled out the old "You are on the customer service side of the desk. I am on the customer side. That means you hush and let me finish asking my questions before you try to anticipate, incorrectly, what my question is going to be." I was having a day, can you tell? But, good grief, don't tell me one thing then change it when I try to follow the rules. She was glad we left. Me, too.
• I am so behind in blogging. My laptop took a dump. All my pics are on it. We need to take it somewhere and have the pics taken off. I'm not worried about anything else. I was trying to get the pics on a disc before it really died, but it didn't happen. 
• And, finally, something that shouldn't make me happy, but makes me freakin' ecstatic: Hubby's oldest brother and his bitch ass wife are getting a divorce! They are the ones that started all the bullshit last holiday season and were our main motivation for amputating our relationship with most of hubby's family. They are the ones that questioned our marriage and relationship and family life without knowing a damn thing about it. All I wanted to do was sing "Ding, dong, the witch is dead. Which ol' witch? The wicked witch!" Will I make it to family functions now? Yeah, no. Thank you so much for the offer, but I think I'll just continue with what I'm doing. Still a very flimsy bridge we cross. 

See, lots of yucky stuff just wanting to boil over. I am not one to keep things in. I think you've figured that out by now. I am a spew it forth kind of gal. Gosh I feel better already. Now to get in the shower and really start my day. Oooo, I think I'm going to the library. Yeah, not that one.