MIxed Up

I was originally going to title this "Jealous Much", but that doesn't really begin to cover the things I feel like writing about tonight. I'm feeling a little maudlin. Stinkin' hormones. I'm up, I'm down, I'm spinning all around. Stop the insanity. Here's what I have for your reading enjoyment tonight.

When I started taking and being a distributor for JP, my upline was very friendly towards me. I know. They always are. But we knew each other before this. We were friendly before this. We attended the same service at church and spent quite a bit of time on projects and committees. But since the debacle of the breakfast meeting at her house, she doesn't speak to me. It wasn't my fault. I don't feel like I spoke out of turn. I didn't even call any names. I left with my head held high, and my dignity intact. So what happened? Is it because I chose not to be a minion anymore? She doesn't even speak to me at church. I wonder if she's embarrassed? I don't know why she would be, or even why she should be. It wasn't her fault or even a situation of her doing. I don't know. All I know is that she doesn't look me in the eye anymore, she avoids me when she sees me coming, and I feel like I have lost a good friend.

I need to admit publicly that I am jealous of the families that can afford for their children to take multiple dance classes. There are opportunities to take tap, jazz, ballet, pointe, hip hop, lyrical, and modern. Then there is company. You have to take so many years of jazz, tap, and ballet to be in it. Then there are private lessons. You can schedule time with one of the instructors for one on one lessons. They go over fundamentals and offer extra practice. For just four classes, one for me and each of the kids, it costs us right over $100. If you take each of the classes listed above, it would cost one person $169 a month. Then you add recital costumes. If a dancer is in child sizes, it's $65 per costume. If the dancer is in adult sizes it's $75. Multiply that by the number of classes and we are talking some serious money. One mom I know is taking three classes herself, her daughter is taking five, and then there are private lessons. They can run as much as $50 an hour. Then add costumes to all that. I cannot imagine what that must run them after all is said and done. I would very much like to afford to be able to let my kids take more than one class each, but the money is barely there for just our four classes.

I have a tendency to be hard hearted towards people. Who, me? Yeah, me. We were having this conversation at the park with some moms. I'm not the only one, but that doesn't make it right. I will give you enough rope to hang yourself and then I'll tug 'til your feet aren't touching the ground anymore. I get offended mostly when someone has hurt hubby. I don't mean physically, but emotionally. His brothers are on my very short list. I get more offended than he does. I just absolutely refuse to let anyone say anything bad about my man. He works too hard providing a great life for us to be put down by anyone. He is a fantastic husband, a wonderful father, and just about the best person I have ever known. I made it a point that I would not demean or degrade or say anything negative about him on this blog or any other. Whatever issue he and I have is between the two of us. And if you think I'll put up with you saying anything negative, you have another thing coming. All of that to say, I have no nice things to say about his brothers, so I am just not going to say anything at all. I have no sympathy for their circumstances. I got nothing.

That's all I've got for tonight. It's not much, but it's something. Got anything you need to get off your chest? As Dr. Frasier Crane used to say, "I'm listening."