Waving in the Breeze

I could tell you an interesting story about hubby and waving in the breeze, but that's for another time. Instead, I'll tell you that what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Well, not everything. But it's nice to have a little mystery. I could tell you stories that would make you question my judgement (you probably already do) and wish you were me all at the same time. I love that town and I love my man.

No, this is a story about body parts and flabby skin. I take as many opportunities to hang around adults as often as possible. I need the face to face contact. I talk to hubby all day on the phone, but it's nice to see his face. I have my Tuesday co-op, which I love. You can read the other blog for all of the details. I also volunteer at our Veggie co-op. Just about every day that we have co-op, I am there with the other ladies. We all know how great Park Day is. When I am with these ladies, I feel electric. I feel like a switch has been flipped and I am on. Like the camera is rolling and the director has called action. Strangest thing. I don't feel like I'm acting, I feel like I can be my loud, obnoxious, dramatic self and be accepted. I may not always say the right thing, or the politically correct thing, or whatever you want to call it, but it's ok. They never know what's coming out of my mouth and neither do I, until it's already out. But I digress.

A conversation came up at one of these places about changes in our bodies since kids, what we looked like in the past, and where we would really like for things to be. Talk about a lesson in body image. We are all insecure about our bodies, no matter how good or how bad. There is something about ourselves that we would change, something we feel could be better. I could start at the top and work my way down.

One of the major complaints is the belly. Good grief. We all need to cut ourselves a little slack. After three babies, I deserve a little belly. Just not as much as I have. One lady I dance with has lost weight and looks really good. She started working on it last year at the beginning of dance class. I told her one day she was going to blow away. On, no, she says. I still have this and that. And the hardest spot for her to lose the weight was her belly. Isn't it for most of us?

The other was the skin under our arms. The flag, the grandma wing. That ugly, saggy skin that continues to wave after we've stopped. The reason I stopped wearing sleeveless shirts. How embarrasing is that? It seems like no matter how much working out you do, it won't go away. You may have great arms, but there's that little bit of jiggle. I can't stand it. It pisses me off.

And, of course, the boobs. I always say that I'm tired of kicking the ladies around when I take off my bra. One of my friends said she bought her own, even though she was married, so no man could ever say that he paid for her boobs. You go on, girl. My sister is very candid in the fact that she wants hers done. Don't we all? I just want my lifted. I have enough to share for sure, I just want them to look me in the eye when I look in the mirror. Have kids and everything heads south. Those are the first to go.

My sister is a fitness instructor. Doesn't that suck? She knows I love her and am very proud of her. This is a later in life career for her and she's damn good at it. She loves her job. How many people can say that? That doesn't mean she doesn't piss me off. Her pants aren't big enough to fit on one of my legs. She turns sideways and you lose sight of her. I would slap her, but she slaps back, and hard, too. She has always loved going to the gym and working out. There was a time when she couldn't go to the gym after having been going regularly for awhile. She hated it. She loves the way she feels after a workout. And she looks great for a mom of four. I won't tell you how old she is, but she is older than me.

I have never been a gym kind of gal. I like working out at home. I have that huge insecurity that everyone came to the gym to watch me work out. I know they didn't, but that's the way I feel. I really like to do squats and lunges. I look pretty good in a short skirt and high heels. I like to work with hand weights. I have an exercise ball I like to work out with. Yoga is fantastic and I think everyone should do it. It is not as easy as it looks and when you finally get a pose that you haven't been able to do, it's almost euphoric. But let me tell you how I really feel. My problem is that one little glitch will make me quit. I may do really good for months, and then whammo. Hubby and I were walking every night for awhile. The rain and thunderstorms and hubby's long hours threw us off. And we haven't gotten back on. He asked me tonight when we were going to get back at it. So, tomorrow we start, I think.

I would really like to lose thirty pounds by the time we go to Hawaii. I want to be able to wear a bathing suit and feel a little confident in it. I certainly can't afford a gym right now, but I have a ton of videos and a great street to walk on. It doesn't take long. It's about a mile and a half, almost two by the time we're done. Except for the Mello Yello I just finished, I haven't had a soda in a couple of weeks. I feel like my body has finally lost all that bloating from the sodas. The pain in my thumb went away after I stopped. My next challenge is not having dessert. I've been really lax about that and have been indulging just a smidge too much. Cutting that sugar, too, will hopefully help my thumb as well. For those that are curious, sugar affects arthritis and inflammation in your joints. Mine happens to be in my thumb. Hopefully, it will also help me drop some weight. I need to get back to my regular diet instead of the glutton diet.

And I need to pull out my videos and get my butt moving. And my arms. And my legs. And every part of me from the top down. I know I'll feel better. I'll look better. And maybe there won't be so much to wave in the breeze.